Powder snuffed out

Just to be fashionable, Dana's goldfish Powder also died over the weekend. Powder jumped from his bowl and was discovered dead on the floor this morning.

The suicide occurred on the same weekend that two mollies died in the big aquarium.

"This is a clear case of a nerdy fish trying to emulate the cool fish and failing miserably," said an unnamed guppy.

Police initially suspected Powder's involvement in a murder-murder-suicide but has since come to the conclusion that the suicide was unrelated to the molly madness.