Jimmy Legs at center of nasty custody battle

Dueling parents are fighting for custody of aquatic frog Jimmy Legs, Freshwater Adventures has learned. In a case reminiscent of Kramer vs. Kramer, the tiny frog finds himself being manipulated by both sides of his family tree.

Cari Heelan filed a petition with Aqua District Court on Monday in which she requested full custody of Jimmy Legs. The petition was promptly followed by a counter-petition from Tim Baxter, who also seeks full custody.

Heelan purchased Jimmy Legs on Aug. 15 but never named him. Tank officials later granted Tim Baxter the right to name the new frog. Lawyers for Heelan are expected to argue that because Heelan bought the frog, it is hers by right. Attorneys for Baxter are expected to argue that Heelan is a devil worshipper and therefore unfit to raise a frog.

"She's just going to use him in some potion or some strange thing like that," said Miss Demeanor, Baxter's lead counsel. "That woman is always up to something. Most people borrow a cup of sugar or an occasional egg. With her it's 'Do you have an eye of newt' or 'Could I trouble you for a hair off a hog's back?' She's obviously a practicing witch or worse."

The case could go to trial as early as next week. The filing comes only two weeks after the tragic death of Frank "Blue Eyes" Platt and Jimmy's transfer to a frog-only aquarium.

Rachel Platt, who manages the frog-only aquarium where Jimmy currently resides, says the little frog seems unfazed by what is certain to be a huge media event.

"He just continues to swim and poop with a sort of devil-may-care detachment," Platt said. "Personally, the whole thing makes me ill. I mean, Heelan and Baxter? Every feeling revolts. I always said their kids would have webbed feet, and by golly I was right!"

Jimmy is said to be focused on his studies even as the media spotlight turns his way. The frog, a junior at Ribbitt University in suburban Toadstool, is scheduled to graduate in 2007 with a degree in General Amphibious Studies.