Princess Leia dies of head wound

A head wound of unknown origin today claimed the life of Princess Leia, a dwarf blue gourami. Leia was one of two dwarf blue gouramis who arrived in our aquarium on Friday, April 15. Leia's counterpart, Luke, died June 9 of a gill fungus.

Since Luke's death three months ago, Leia was a solitary figure in our aquarium. When she wasn't leading the fish rebellion, she was often seen hiding between the stately columns of the Parthenon.

"She was a very gallant fish," said one sad fish-watcher. "What was she like? She was like most fish. Smarter, sure. Funnier, yes. And so charming."

Luke and Leia were pioneers, meaning they were among the first group of fish to be added to our community aquarium. Leia is the 33rd fish to die in our aquarium this year.

"Stupid people have asked me when we're replacing her," said TankKeeper during his afternoon press conference. "There is no replacing her."

Wade Sisson, Leia's owner, declined to be interviewed for this story but did release a statement through his press secretary.

"Princess Leia was a part of our aquarium for five remarkable months. She will never really leave us."

The Liquid Education project has been renamed the Princess Leia Shrine of Knowledge in honor of the late gourami whose contributions to education and freedom were well-known.

A funeral is scheduled for this evening at St. Ignatius Loyola. All events private.