Saltwater Silence:Fish angered by lack of correspondence from sister tank

Fish of our community aquarium are increasingly despondent over the dearth of communication coming from our sister saltwater aquarium, Freshwater Adventures has learned.

Salty Speculation, the official blog of the main building's saltwater aquarium, reported last month that four fish are living in the new aquarium. Media reports today suggest that a second wave of fish were added to the saltwater aquarium as recently as yesterday.

"We heard they got some new fish but heck if anyone is saying anything about it," said Aubrey, our community tank's largest marble molly. "Apparently salt deludes one's ability to have good manners.

It is just beyond my comprehension how they can keep quiet about all of this."

Some freshwater fish have started jokingly referring to the saltwater aquarium as Area 51.

"A lot of things are allegedly going on there," said one platy who spoke on condition of anonymity. "All I can tell you is I see funny things happening over there at night -- strange bags of water going in, empty bags going out. They've definitely keeping something alive in that tank."

Another fish suggested dark motives at work.

"This conspiracy of silence leads one to believe they are doing things over there that they shouldn't be," said the anonymous fish source. "What could be it? It could be that they're using human stem cells to generate a race of superfish. That's a distinct possibility."

Fatty Arbuckle the balloon belly molly said she couldn't care less about the motives behind the silence. She simply wants it to end.

"We simply must know what is happening in that aquarium," Fatty said. "We know nothing of them now, and I find that quite intolerable indeed. My God, those fish could be Eurotrash for all we know."

The staff of Salty Speculation could not be reached for comment.